That is why I celebrated National Take A Walk In The Park Day today instead of yesterday. The hubby had the day off and we had a picnic, got rushed by a hundred ducks and geese and had a blast! Listen, I love you. You know I do, but I've got to say that blogging five days a week is especially hard. I can see why many do it twice a week. Silly me decided one blog wasn't good enough. Oh NO! I have two. So, I'm going to cut back on my blogging days. You don't need me every day. Hell, people in my actual life don't need me every day, except my little family here at home. Without me they'd starve and live in utter filth. So I'm taking a deep breath and cutting back my days of blogging. That way I don't feel so...panicked.
Here's a quick reminder: Wednesday is the 7th Annual World Autism Awareness Day and April is National Autism Awareness Month (NAAM). Wear blue and if you can, put a blue (energy efficient) bulb in that porch light and let it shine! I will be back on my blog on Wednesday. See? The anticipation is already building! Hehe. Cheers...wait. Crap. Where's my beer? Ah, there it is. Cheers!
Monday, March 31, 2014
Friday, March 28, 2014
Freaky Friday!
Yeah it's freaky! For me at least. I have a doctor appointment (hate those). Before I go, let me share with you what I found in my other folder on Facebook in March. It's from a perfect stranger and was sent in February. Yeah, I don't check the other folder often. His Facebook page seems legit, but who knows? Here we go!
Facebook (stalker?) admirer:
What a lovely picture you have got.I know you do not know me before but don't be frightened.....I am just an admirer.I am single and thought it will cause no harm to drop a short note to say hi to a beautiful lady like you......Never mean to flatter you but you are really pretty for real....Maybe we can get to know each other,Waiting impatiently to hear from you....lol. Love ya sweet smile
I had to feed the stray...my response:
Facebook (stalker?) admirer:
What a lovely picture you have got.I know you do not know me before but don't be frightened.....I am just an admirer.I am single and thought it will cause no harm to drop a short note to say hi to a beautiful lady like you......Never mean to flatter you but you are really pretty for real....Maybe we can get to know each other,Waiting impatiently to hear from you....lol. Love ya sweet smile
I had to feed the stray...my response:
Just found this in my "other" folder, lol. Now I'm trying to remember what picture you possibly saw. Thanks for the flattery. I'm happily married but appreciate the compliments all the same
Thursday, March 27, 2014
Goopy Thursday
Here I am! Better late than never, right? Here in California it's still Thursday, but since it's not Thursday everywhere, I'll save Throwback Thursday for next Thursday. It's really fun, so I hear, er, read. We'll do that next time. As for tonight, instead of simplifying your life, goopify it! Do any of you read Gwyneth Paltrow's Goop website? Yeah, me neither. Anyhoo, here is a fun link: http://www.slate.com/articles/life/low_concept/2014/03/gwyneth_paltrow_is_consciously_uncoupled_what_s_your_goop_ified_relationship.html
I am "purposefully interlaced." I'm also really tired, so I'm going to finish this beer and call it a night. Cheers and goodnight!
I am "purposefully interlaced." I'm also really tired, so I'm going to finish this beer and call it a night. Cheers and goodnight!
Wednesday, March 26, 2014
Am I The Only One Having One Of Those Days?
It's Wednesday! We're halfway through the week, but it's one of those days, at least for me. Of course there are people out there with worse problems than me. I try to stay current with the news both at home and around the world, but that still doesn't prevent me from having a self-inflicted pity party. We all need to throw ourselves one of these parties every now and again. Then we need to snap out of it, count our blessings and roll with the punches.
So, I'll snap these fingers (oh my, I really do need to get some polish on those suckers), count my blessings, which are many, and roll with the punches. Screw it! I'm popping open a beer and watching some meaningless dribble on Netflix. Cheers!
So, I'll snap these fingers (oh my, I really do need to get some polish on those suckers), count my blessings, which are many, and roll with the punches. Screw it! I'm popping open a beer and watching some meaningless dribble on Netflix. Cheers!
Tuesday, March 25, 2014
It Costs How Much To Rent A Campground Space?!
$45 a night. This is just a simple campground-no hook-ups, no frills, probably no campfires. I do believe I can get a cheap hotel and hooker on Sierra Highway for that price. I said I believe, I don't actually KNOW! Quit staring at the computer screen like that!
The money charged for the campground sites go to the maintenance and upkeep of the campgrounds, forests, Ranger's salaries, etc., but it still hurts the pocketbook knowing I have to pay $180 for a four-day camping trip. That's before firewood (assuming we can have campfires), food, gas and most importantly, beer. Ah, but it must be done. Camping is a must for this family. We even plan two or three trips a year. I'm not saying we go on them, because after the first camping trip we've usually had enough roughing it for the year. But we do plan them. As a matter of fact, we have an RV camping trip planned with the in-laws for August. From the beautiful Antelope Valley, to Mammoth Lakes then on to Tahoe. This is either going to be really fun or a hellish nightmare. Regardless, I'll have material for my blog.
Anybody out there have any camping trips planned?
The money charged for the campground sites go to the maintenance and upkeep of the campgrounds, forests, Ranger's salaries, etc., but it still hurts the pocketbook knowing I have to pay $180 for a four-day camping trip. That's before firewood (assuming we can have campfires), food, gas and most importantly, beer. Ah, but it must be done. Camping is a must for this family. We even plan two or three trips a year. I'm not saying we go on them, because after the first camping trip we've usually had enough roughing it for the year. But we do plan them. As a matter of fact, we have an RV camping trip planned with the in-laws for August. From the beautiful Antelope Valley, to Mammoth Lakes then on to Tahoe. This is either going to be really fun or a hellish nightmare. Regardless, I'll have material for my blog.
Anybody out there have any camping trips planned?
Monday, March 24, 2014
What Happens When You Yell "BOOYA!" In A Public Bathroom?
Come on, people. Do you really think I'd actually yell "Booya!" in a public bathroom? Yes? Well then, I guess you DO know me.
The family and I went to a fundraising event Friday night at our local Jethawks Stadium and were lucky enough to meet the pilots and crew of the Navy's Blue Angels. Here are some highlights from the event:
Me: Hello there! What is that you're wearing?
Blue Angel Crew Member: My uniform, ma'am.
Me: What I mean is why is it a different color than the pilot's uniform?
Blue Angel Crew Member: Because I'm not a pilot, ma'am.
Obviously eloquence is not one of my strong points. We shared a good laugh and he explained his job duties.
My hubby accidentally kicked over a pilot's beer. It just so happened to be the pilot I may have accosted in the beer line earlier that night (don't ask.) Of COURSE I bought him a new one. I'm not an animal! Perhaps that's up for debate.
Here's another snippet of conversation between me and the semi-accosted pilot:
Me: So, where are the Blue Angels?
Blue Angel Pilot: They're under the tent, ma'am.
Me: You fit the planes under the tent?
Blue Angel Pilot: Oh! No ma'am. We couldn't fit them here, so it's just us Blue Angel pilots gathered under the tent.
After one or two (several) beers, I decided to conduct an experiment. This experiment was conducted in a series of three bathroom visits.
The first two visits consisted of me yelling at my purse. Nothing. Apparently when you go into a public stall and start yelling at your purse, nobody bats an eye. It must be a woman thing. But yell "Booya!" twice and the place clears out. Quickly.
I was in my stall. The first time I yelled "Booya!" the whole room fell silent, except for the scurrying of people rushing to get out, especially the lady in the stall next to me.
I gave one more "Booya!" shout-out for good measure and heard a soft,"Oh my!" before the woman rushed out (AFTER washing her hands, thank goodness.)
Side note: I was telling the hubby yesterday about today's blog topic. "That explains why everybody was rushing out of the restroom looking freaked out," he says. Yes, it certainly does.
Imagine my amusement yesterday having to hear "Booya!" being yelled by the hubby every thirty minutes or so throughout the house followed by hysterical laughter.
The family and I went to a fundraising event Friday night at our local Jethawks Stadium and were lucky enough to meet the pilots and crew of the Navy's Blue Angels. Here are some highlights from the event:
Me: Hello there! What is that you're wearing?
Blue Angel Crew Member: My uniform, ma'am.
Me: What I mean is why is it a different color than the pilot's uniform?
Blue Angel Crew Member: Because I'm not a pilot, ma'am.
Obviously eloquence is not one of my strong points. We shared a good laugh and he explained his job duties.
My hubby accidentally kicked over a pilot's beer. It just so happened to be the pilot I may have accosted in the beer line earlier that night (don't ask.) Of COURSE I bought him a new one. I'm not an animal! Perhaps that's up for debate.
Here's another snippet of conversation between me and the semi-accosted pilot:
Me: So, where are the Blue Angels?
Blue Angel Pilot: They're under the tent, ma'am.
Me: You fit the planes under the tent?
Blue Angel Pilot: Oh! No ma'am. We couldn't fit them here, so it's just us Blue Angel pilots gathered under the tent.
After one or two (several) beers, I decided to conduct an experiment. This experiment was conducted in a series of three bathroom visits.
The first two visits consisted of me yelling at my purse. Nothing. Apparently when you go into a public stall and start yelling at your purse, nobody bats an eye. It must be a woman thing. But yell "Booya!" twice and the place clears out. Quickly.
I was in my stall. The first time I yelled "Booya!" the whole room fell silent, except for the scurrying of people rushing to get out, especially the lady in the stall next to me.
I gave one more "Booya!" shout-out for good measure and heard a soft,"Oh my!" before the woman rushed out (AFTER washing her hands, thank goodness.)
Side note: I was telling the hubby yesterday about today's blog topic. "That explains why everybody was rushing out of the restroom looking freaked out," he says. Yes, it certainly does.
Imagine my amusement yesterday having to hear "Booya!" being yelled by the hubby every thirty minutes or so throughout the house followed by hysterical laughter.
Friday, March 21, 2014
Foolish Falderal Friday! Go Ahead, Get The Dictionary...
TGIF! Hope you are having a fantastically fabulous Friday! Here is a foolish little poem about a bus ride I took twelve years ago titled: The Bus Ride (Yes, yes, the title is quite original, don't you think?)
Once upon a starry night the moon was brightly lit.
A gentle breeze tickles distant trees and on this bus I sit.
Gazing out my window admiring the night
Wishing I could read my book, alas there is no light.
Dispersing that one thought I gaze outside once more.
Slowly I’m relaxing when a man begins to snore.
His snoring becomes louder as he sleeps without a care,
Protected by his peaceful dreams against my cold, hard
glare.
Trying my best to block out the noise I take in more sights
ASTOUNDING!
The bus driver almost sideswiped a truck and it sends my
heart a-pounding.
The best thing to do in a case such as this is to quickly
drift asleep.
Of course this proves most difficult when a child is kicking
the seat!
Finally peace and quiet with a little time to think…
I spoke to soon, it figures! The bathroom’s making the whole
bus stink!
_________________________________________________________________________________
Stay tuned! I'll be back Monday. Next Friday I will be sharing a little gem I found in my other folder on Facebook. It's fun, fatuous and, dare I add, a little freaky.
falderal [fal-duh-ral]
noun
1.) mere nonsense, foolish talk or ideas
2.) a trifle; gimcrack; gew-gaw
Can't leave you hanging! If you're wondering what the hell a gimcrack is, like I was, I'll tell you: it's a trifle or gew-gaw. A gew-gaw is what a baby babbles. No, it's a showy, gaudy but valueless and useless trinket or bauble. If you don't know what a bauble is, you're on your own. I've got pizza to eat and beer to drink. Have a great weekend! Cheers!
Thursday, March 20, 2014
Here Stalker, Stalker! Go Bing Yourself!
Out of curiosity I typed my name into the Google search engine to see what would pop up. You know you've done it, too. If not, no worries, this blog will be here when you return from your search. This was a relatively boring search. However, when I typed my name into the Bing search engine, the white pages popped up. Here you will find:
-My phone number
-My approximate age
-People I may know
-My physical address
-A map showing how to get to my physical address
-My home's current value
-My weight and bra size
Maybe I made up the last two, but for a flat fee you can run a full background check on me. Save your money; I've been to jail twice and my driving record is clean. Yes, all of our information is out there! Kind of scary, huh?
-My phone number
-My approximate age
-People I may know
-My physical address
-A map showing how to get to my physical address
-My home's current value
-My weight and bra size
Maybe I made up the last two, but for a flat fee you can run a full background check on me. Save your money; I've been to jail twice and my driving record is clean. Yes, all of our information is out there! Kind of scary, huh?
Wednesday, March 19, 2014
My Mailman Is A Crook
Who would've thought my archenemy would be the mailman, or, to be PC, the mail carrier? Nah, fuck it, let's go with mailspawn. It never fails, regardless of who is delivering my mail, they always end up being weird, an asshole, or a combination of the two.
Monday March 16th I put my .49 cent stamp on my 9x12 manila envelope, clearly having a blonde moment, as I know it requires TWO .49 cent stamps.
Checking my mail, I see my envelope with "Two more stamps needed" scribbled in the upper corner. Wait, TWO more stamps needed? *headshake* Whatever. Gently peeling off my unused stamp, I affix it to a letter-size envelope (standard No. 10 Security envelope, if you please) and place it in the mail.
I'll be damned if the mailspawn didn't place THAT envelope back into my mailbox with his chickenscratch writing stating "Stamp no good", having circled the date on the stamp. (I bought it on March 13th.) But if it was good enough on the 16th it should be good enough on the 17th. Well played, mailspawn, well played.
I have an ace in my hand, a trick up my sleeve, a...oh, hell, I have a brand new Forever stamp. Now, let's see him try to put the envelope in my mailbox TODAY with some lame bullshitty excuse to cheat me out of my money. Oh, and I will be taking that .49 cent stamp back to the post office to recoup my money. It's about the principal now, isn't it?
Monday March 16th I put my .49 cent stamp on my 9x12 manila envelope, clearly having a blonde moment, as I know it requires TWO .49 cent stamps.
Checking my mail, I see my envelope with "Two more stamps needed" scribbled in the upper corner. Wait, TWO more stamps needed? *headshake* Whatever. Gently peeling off my unused stamp, I affix it to a letter-size envelope (standard No. 10 Security envelope, if you please) and place it in the mail.
I'll be damned if the mailspawn didn't place THAT envelope back into my mailbox with his chickenscratch writing stating "Stamp no good", having circled the date on the stamp. (I bought it on March 13th.) But if it was good enough on the 16th it should be good enough on the 17th. Well played, mailspawn, well played.
I have an ace in my hand, a trick up my sleeve, a...oh, hell, I have a brand new Forever stamp. Now, let's see him try to put the envelope in my mailbox TODAY with some lame bullshitty excuse to cheat me out of my money. Oh, and I will be taking that .49 cent stamp back to the post office to recoup my money. It's about the principal now, isn't it?
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